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Dating With Herpes
dating with herpes?
I recently met a guy who I connected with right away. We never had any type of sexual contact, not even kissing. The other day day he told me he had genital herpes, and i'm torn I really like him, but don't know if I want to risk it, he's taking meds. Has anyone been in a similar situation? known anyone who has? Even if not would you be with someone with herpes if you were clean?
I want to know if you were in my situation. what would you do? would you ever be with someone with herpes?
60% of the population (here in the UK) has the herpes simplex virus. Herpes simplex type1 is more likely to cause cold sores on your face and herpes simplex type 2 is more likely to cause sores on your genitals, but both can cause sores in both areas!
HSV-1 and HSV-2 can be found in and released from the sores that the viruses cause, but they also are released between outbreaks from skin that does not appear to be broken or to have a sore. Generally, a person can only get HSV-2 infection during sexual contact with someone who has a genital HSV-2 infection. Transmission can occur from an infected partner who does not have a visible sore and may not know that he or she is infected.
HSV-1 can cause genital herpes, but it more commonly causes infections of the mouth and lips, so-called "fever blisters." HSV-1 infection of the genitals can be caused by oral-genital or genital-genital contact with a person who has HSV-1 infection. Genital HSV-1 outbreaks recur less regularly than genital HSV-2 outbreaks.
So a person can have the virus for years without showing any symptoms and a person can transmit the virus through asymptomatic shedding of the skin without even knowing they have it.
Whether you stay with your boyfriend or not is up to you. I think you need to read more about the virus to decide how you feel about it and make an informed decision. Herpes is not like HIV or Hepititis. It's not pleasant, sure, but it's not that serious either. However there is a slight risk to the unborn children of pregnant women who have genital herpes. Condoms do not offer much protection from genital herpes. Genital ulcer diseases can occur in both male and female genital areas that are covered or protected by a latex condom, as well as in areas that are not covered. Correct and consistent use of latex condoms can reduce the risk of genital herpes only when the infected area or site of potential exposure is protected. Since a condom may not cover all infected areas, even correct and consistent use of latex condoms cannot guarantee protection from genital herpes.
So you could actually catch genital herpes from anyone you sleep with. They would not know they had it and you would not know you caught it. You could have it right now. The signs and symptoms associated with HSV-2 can vary greatly. Health care providers can diagnose genital herpes by visual inspection if the outbreak is typical, and by taking a sample from the sore(s) and testing it in a laboratory. HSV infections can be difficult to diagnose between outbreaks. Blood tests, which detect HSV-1 or HSV-2 infection, may be helpful, although the results are not always clear-cut.
Do some research and thank your boyfriend for being honest. He didn't have to tell you.
How to Make Dating With Herpes Less Stressful
An estimated fifty million adults in America are infected by the herpes simplex virus and the wide majority of them do not know. This blissful ignorance is the reason why herpes is the fastest growing sexually transmitted diseases amongst young adults. Now chances are those stats don't make you feel any better about your situation, but it is important to realize that you are not alone. Although you should not feel limited to dating strictly within the herpes community, doing so is a great way to help eliminate some of the stresses you may feel when you think about dating people who do not have herpes.
Dating with herpes can be very stressful, and as you know - stress is the last thing you need because it can cause those outbreaks! Because of this, many single people with herpes have purposely reduced themselves to a life of celibacy and shy away from new relationships. Just because you're infected with oral or genital herpes, that does not mean that you need to lead the life of a hermit crab!
Thanks to the resourcefulness that the internet provides, there are online dating and personal sites for just about everyone under the sun. Be you white, black, tall, short, Jewish or Christian, there's a dating website that caters to you. This same thing goes for people infected with oral and genital herpes! Yup, there are dozens of herpes dating websites.
PositiveSingles, MPwH and STDDate are amongst the most popular. They provide a safe place for people with the virus to come together and interact without fear of judgment or ridicule. No matter what you decide to do, just don't take yourself out of the dating game. Don't allow the disease to take away your opportunity for love.
About the Author
Have you struggled with relationships since being diagnosed with genital herpes? Herpes doesn't signal the end of your love life. As managing editor of YouGotHerpes.com, Savannah Francis gives practical tips and advice on how to have a fulfilling and meaningful love life after herpes. For the best tips on dating with herpes, visit us today at Herpes Dating Sites
